Moment of epiphany

I was on the brink of losing my usual positive disposition and get into "life really sucks" mode.  Past few weeks have been quite a challenge considering the responsibilities that have tagged along with increasing work. It has been quite a while since I attended my usual weekend shoots or visited art exhibitions. When I stay away from my passions for little longer time, I experience range of emotions that leave me conflicted, discordant, distressed, unmoved and completely uninspired.   

Pursuit of creativity is my inherent need, a lingering urge and once it is met, something clicks in my cerebrum, turning all that dissonance into consonance, things align and  I feel present and rejuvenated physically, intellectually, and emotionally. Colours, forms, textures and perspectives give me great high. 

Going back to my almost getting into "life really sucks" mode; there I was, stressed and withdrawn, looking blankly outside my window one evening when something interesting happened. I saw a tiny bird, hopping from one branch to other singing its heart loud! 

Our garden has some interesting range of birds paying visit every day. This tiny bird has been competing with cuckoo in singing and I always admire its guts. Though it is not as loud but it makes sure that we get up with its first visit early morning and keeps giving us reminders of its presence throughout the day. Despite numerous attempts, I have not yet been able to capture  it in my camera. I have run frantically from one window of the room to other, to every part of the garden and under each tree in search of this bird several times but its swift movements always seem beyond my competence.

After putting immense efforts I have gracefully accepted my defeat from this bird and feel deeply humbled. Interestingly, during my chase I noticed something that I have been missing out - sheer abundance of forms, textures, colours and perspectives...all that I love! 

How come I didn't notice these amazing abstract designs and textures on the bark and trunk of the tree, burst of colours and forms on leaves and flowers? It is not that I have not been aware of this bounty but sadly have been buried in lot of things to notice so much beauty around. 

Moments that burst out of utter wonderment or creativity are difficult to describe. What we sometimes miss out are such simple moments that need not be trail blazing factors but like the quiet pulse beat, actually hold essential rhythm of life. And that tiny bird has given me this beautiful moment of epiphany. I find its songs much sweeter now. Hope I capture it on my camera. Till then, it would be known as angel of God that helped me lift my spirits.

Platinum trash

About a fortnight back, an article from New York Times, "why I am leaving Goldman Sachs" went viral on social networking sites creating quite a furor in the field of investment banking/asset management world over. When I read that article, I could relate to the anguish expressed by Mr. Greg Smith. I have never worked with Goldman Sachs or have done any business with the group but in my experience of more than a decade in the field of investments, I have sometimes paid price due to greedy and callous attitude of people and shockingly unprofessional/unethical work culture of portfolio/asset management companies.


A few months back, I got a call from my former relationship manager. He wanted to meet and discuss "better investment options" with me. The call was a surprise and instantly put myself on "alert" mode as I was already introduced to the new relationship manager assigned for my portfolio in a meeting and was informed that his predecessor (the person who called me) had left the organization.

There was no iota of guilt or shame in approach of former relationship manager and he went on bragging about how he planned to poach HNI clients and take their business to the new company he had joined.  I cringed at his complete disregard for the seriousness of the fact that he had breached trust and he still had access to sensitive information of a client's investments that he was technically not entitled to! I Panicked and immediately approached my portfolio management company. I was given assurance by the top brass that my money and information about my investment was in safe hands. 


Do I still trust this organization? I trust the organization for its accuracy of research on various investment instruments but when it comes to service and trusting the people working for it, the answer is not as simple as yes or no. The experience mentioned above is a rare occurrence. However, it does reflect on work ethics or the complete lack of it on personal, professional and organizational level. Fortunately, regulations covering investor protection are becoming imminent with time and there is much more transparency now. But there are many areas that still need to be looked into.     


There is tremendous competition and pressure created by the burgeoning investment markets but people working in this industry are not always experienced, knowledgeable or competent enough to meet demands of the job. Sadly, they are also not always trained for good communication hence they often fail to understand customer's profile and investment requirements. Can you imagine the frustration of wasting hours of time and energy for the product that is not suitable for your investment profile? But these "power point tigers"(my hubby nicknamed them long back) chase you, hound you and you wonder if all those checks of obscene amount of fees that you pay to create and manage wealth is really worth it!


As a customer, what would make me happy will not be invitations to events at five star deluxe hotel, expensive gifts on New Year or festivals or VIP treatment. I will be a content customer when my investment profile is understood and respected by my portfolio management company and the people assigned for my work. I respect them when they suggest various investment options based on substantial research and don't sell me products only for the higher incentives involved. As a customer; I expect my portfolio management team to be aware and updated about changes in policies/government rules that might have impact on my investments if any and educate me on the same. 


The fundamental problem I feel is with the attitude of people and culture of the companies involved with investment industry. There is difference in wealth creation and making "fast bucks". The business of wealth creation is about savvy asset allocation, prudent decisions and creating mutually beneficial relationship between a customer and portfolio management company. Sidelining customer's interest to achieve targets is a professional harakiri. 


As an investor, I refuse to be taken for granted or give in to any unprofessional methods. It is time portfolio management companies got real and recognized the fact that each customer is an important key to their success and not just a "platinum trash" that can be easily manipulated for the sake of their own advantage. If the customer does not find value in portfolio management service, there is no scope for them to grow. Period!

Remnants of history

I have just arrived from unplanned travel that my work demanded. I badly need to rush to spa as there are little aches and pains of fatigue all over my body screaming for some mercy. I have gleefully abandoned all the work that was waiting for my attention the moment I am home. There is terrible guilt in my heart for being late for this week's article but believe me, I have missed writing immensely!

A typical lane at Udwada at early morning 

Despite crazily hectic schedule of last few days, my brain is brimming with so many tales! I had to travel a lot by road during my journey and the most intriguing place I visited was, Udwada. Albeit it was for only two hours, it certainly made up for all the stressful time I had during my trip. Udwada is a treasure trove of delight if you are a photographer and writer! For a person who thrives in urban chaos, this town exudes tranquility and stunningly beautiful old world charm. It is a known fact that Parsis, (followers of Zoroastrianism) entered India through this lovely town.

A Parsi House by the street at Udwada village

Looking at the locked houses and the languid pace of this place, one is compelled to think about not just days and months but the years and decades that might have passed by when the town and its breathtakingly beautiful cottage bungalows would have come to life! One feels weight of years that has passed by in to eternity! The time stands still and one finds remnants of history strewn all around in town. 

A library for Parsi community

The delight of a trip is always in the tumbling out of stories inside your head that visit when they are least expected; long after you return home; and while you are away, exactly reverse happens when home comes wafting to you in a sudden collision with some fragrance or sound that grips your heart with nostalgia for what it reminisces. 

One of the locked houses at Udwada

The problem with me is, the moment I like some place the nomad in me emerges forcefully and it feels as if something has possessed me and turned my soul inside out! Every corner of this town seemed to be inviting me but unfortunately, I didn't have luxury of time to explore this place the way I would have loved to.

Picture of Zarathrusta, outside almost every Parsi home in Udwada

When I drove off from Udwada, I was trying to hold on to its exquisite beauty, hoping secretly that it remains untouched by rest of the world. Some places should remain just the way they are; untouched with time, holding on to its strong character. I am afraid it may not remain like that for long. An important part of our heritage is crumbling slowly and I feel utterly helpless.

A Parsi Mansion

"Tribes" on Social Networking Sites...

It takes all kinds of people to make this world and virtual world is no different. There is interesting menagerie of people and connecting with them is great fun. The way we connect and interact, the way we conduct ourselves on social networking sites, reveals great deal about who we truly are.

For me, social networking sites serve as laboratory where I observe, study and understand my own behaviour and that of other people around me. My observation has sometimes surprised me, shocked me but invariably always entertained me!

The "Tribes" on Social Networking Sites  


The Gifted : Well-read people, globe trotters, accomplished artists - painters, sculptures, writers, photographers, people with eclectic taste in life in general, consist this group. Having them in your buddy list is enriching experience. They are treasure and great value addition to your life.

The Adorable Jackass/Bimbette : These are generally harmless creatures. They don't have to do much except be their natural selves. With them around, great entertainment is guaranteed. They are a constant assurance that life can't be so bad when even such people get to survive and thrive!


The Humorist : Members from this clan are a MUST on your buddy list. Life seems so much fun with someone making you laugh with brilliant humour. They are innovative, witty and interesting people with razor sharp brains, presence of mind and fun loving attitude. Count on them for your daily dose of laughter.


The Delusional NRI Behenji : This is a very unique species. They are typical, English speaking behenjis, strutting in luxury brands proclaiming superiority over everybody with the sheer merit of their citizenship status. They suffer a delusion that every Indian friend is jealous of them and that very notion gives great boost to their fragile ego. Expect a lot of drama from them. If you love watching soaps, this tribe will thoroughly entertain you with its antics. 


The Bully : If you thought that bullies exist only in school/colleges, think again! These are people who have some unattended core issues. Their bullying methods are indication that they need to learn basic social skills. You can be an easy target for as simple a reason as refusing their friend request or showing them their place when they try to act funny with you. Their style of abuse is passive aggression. Their comments either use code words for their target or are often well crafted, without mentioning any name. They thrive on constantly maligning people and perform the task with utmost precision, as if it is their moral obligation! Life is a great leveler so leave them to their karma.


The Blessed Soul : These are gem of the people, very content with life even when it is not always that great. They exude positive vibes, cheer and love wherever they go. There is no pretense in their behaviour, are mature and worthy of making friends forever. They value goodness and nurture it in everyone that crosses their path. 


Conniving Shrew : Beneath her painstakingly nurtured cosmetic concealers of makeup and ego, lies layered insecurities, hostility and inadequacies of a person who has been emotionally and mentally bruised repeatedly. The bitterness caused by those experiences is still buried deep inside her. It is difficult to see her REAL face till you have been victim of her games. She is expert player and can ruin your reputation by spreading false stories and rumours if she finds her "friends" showing more interest in you and paying more attention to you compared to her.   
Don't be fooled by her apology and begging for adding her again. No matter how smart and intelligent you are, you can't beat this manipulative woman. Forgive her and forget her once and for all.  


The Narcissist Brigade : They are self-centered braggers who can't see beyond their nose. They create their own mutual admiration club where all the members pamper each other's ego. You don't need to join their club unless you have serious self esteem issues. They are best avoided! 


The Fierce Competitor : Again, very interesting personality type! Social networking sites, like their life is a battle ground for them. They are here to compete and stay ahead. If someone compliments you for your son's achievement, this person will mention ten achievements of his own child while congratulating you. I guess you get the point!


The Snob : This personality type seriously believes that everyone is participating in some kind of a show and he/she is clearly in the lead for a reason! Well, the best way to deal with them is to ignore them lest they become pain in the @** !  :D


The Guardian Angels : Don't look surprised! Such people really exist. They don't necessarily participate in your threads everyday but are aware of what is happening in your life. A smallest hint of something wrong at your end alerts them and they are there to protect you, guide you and help you. They are great support system and are your TRUE friends. Hold on to them.


Frenemies : Like the title suggests, they have been great friends once but have fallen apart for some reason. Both parties share instantaneous hatred, reciprocal nastiness and conspiracies.  They might surprise us by occasional flashes of remorse but nothing changes really and the common friends are compelled to witness their melodrama every day. 


The "Silvers" : I love them immensely! They are senior citizens, grand-parents and they have great life experience to learn from. They remind you of your own. These silvers have seen it all and are great inspiration. By all means, be friends with them. You will be surprised to find that they are far much younger at heart than many of us!  


The Fake Bitch/Creep : Do I even need to explain? It doesn't take long to know their true face behind the facade they so convincingly put on. Only thing that hurts most is the realization of time and energy we have wasted after such people. Don't be hard on yourself for being so blind and falling for their charm. It happens, even with the most intelligent people. Just shrug it off!


The Absolute Jerk : These are people who repeatedly poke you, send friend requests despite being declined. There is another type that shows their creepy side after winning your confidence and becoming your friend. They write personal messages asking out for coffee, write compliments in suggestive manner on your photographs and ask for your phone numbers. Deleting them doesn't help. If law allowed, you would love to shoot this JERK! 


Life on social networking sites is not about having thousands of friends but about being really able to "connect"...........

Why are we verbose on social networking sites

We, human beings have inherent need to share and connect with other fellow human beings. "Man is by nature, social animal..." said Aristotle. 


We are sharing and connecting with world like never before! The unique, convenient communication tool of various social networking sites is at our service helping us reach out to the world. It is amazing how we are able to find likeminded people and form deeper connections. There is a sense of belonging and it is easier to reach out to others at click of the mouse. 


Our interpersonal relationship and need for communicating with the world has changed drastically. Our relationship with the world seems much more direct, open and engaging. After closely observing and participating in interactions and connecting with many people from diverse backgrounds on social networking sites for quite some years, I have noticed that we are sharing far too much in virtual world and it is certainly, much more beyond meeting our inherent need to share and connect. The question is why are we so verbose on social networking sites? 


With so many avenues open for talk and express views, we have suddenly found a voice and we sometimes get a false notion of being listened to. There have been many instances when I have been utterly shocked by the content shared on Facebook, Google plus or twitter. A social networking site plays role of a sanctuary, where friends, loved ones and our extended circle can connect and create a cozy microcosm. But even within that little world there are things that are too personal in nature to be shared with anyone. Why are we unabashedly making our lives public, I wonder? What makes us keen to broadcast every minute detail of our life on a public platform is a matter of interesting study. 


Behind our carefully crafted personae; there is a human being, seeking attention. Some of us are little more desperate than others. We want novelty from our mundane life. We wish for camaraderie, distraction, recognition, acceptance, feedback, validation and even love! Ever thought about what are we conveying through our status messages and comments?


We are talking about all kinds of subjects from God, politics, art, literature, movies, theater, music, children, love , marriage, universe etc. and it is indeed wonderful! Most of the comments people write are very appropriate, scholarly and extremely elegantly written. Perhaps, some of them can be considered even the best written comments on the subject! Each person behind that comment is extending his/her consciousness to the discussion as he/she needs that intellectual/emotional/sentimental stimulation to connect with people from his/her self-created microcosm. We want discussion, chatter, gossip and convey we are "alive ' and that our existence really matters in thousand different ways. There is this bittersweet narcissism about it. 


When I sometimes read incessant status/comments on Facebook/Google plus/ twitter and see the photographs shared, I am tempted to tell people, "PLEASE get a life!" I am not setting myself above the fray. Most of us have experienced that state of going overboard on social networking sites but mercifully come back to our senses.


What we need to understand is that Social networking sites can sometimes deprive us of our solitude without offering us companionship. Sadly, that is too steep a price to pay and absolutely not worth it. 


Sometimes, its great to honour silence methinks.