I am at friend's place; patiently listening to arguments between her and her hubby in the room full of shopping bags from Tanishq, Zara, Da Milano, Wills, Mango, Charles and Keith, Catwalk and all possible brands in clothing/bags/fashion accessories/shoes, strewn all around. Stuff is popping out of the bags that seem to be lying there for days. She is sobbing and I am struggling hard to conceal my shock and anger.
My friend has blown absolutely obscene amount in shopping during last few weeks, tempted by the 'sale' signs that offer, to put in her words, "once in a year opportunity to buy things at irresistible prices." In seems, this year, their plan for travelling abroad during Diwali, might be shelved. After confiding in me about the repercussions of my friend's mindless spending and arguing over how half of things bought are unnecessary, my friend's hubby tramples out of room, agitated and deeply saddened. I understand his anguish also has its root in falling rupee, volatile stock markets and rising costs causing overall gloom in his business. Unfortunately, my friend's face doesn't show iota of guilt or shame. She is more concerned about the possibility of holidays getting cancelled!
I am sure we all are familiar with a situation like my friend's. We all love shopping, don't we? (unless of course, one has become an ascetic). There is a great kick in living life to the fullest by indulging in anything and everything that brings us happiness in some form. Whether we admit it or not, all of us have penchant for careless spending. We buy things not only because we need but also out of boredom and ennui. We spend money to cheer ourselves up, to fill that existential void to make up for things that are wrong in our life or missing. (I am not implying that those who shop necessarily suffer some lack in life). We buy stuff driven by motivation and wants to flaunt our "status" and broadcast that we have "arrived". We incessantly splurge to keep up with the rest of the world so that we don't look like losers and fulfil our ego. We blow money for many psychological and social reasons that have absolutely no connection with our real needs.
We all have choices and ending up like my friend is result of making a wrong choice. Albeit, we are far too conceited sometimes to admit our mistake and carry on as if everything is "under control". We may have choices and even power in our hands but when it comes to execution, we often fail. Reasons? Because, its so easy to waste money that brings "feel good" factor to our otherwise mundane lives with harsh realities. We even label it with tempting names like 'retail therapy" and justify the indulgence by "earned it/ deserved it/got it" mind-set that offers great escape.
You must be wondering what has got into me today! Shocked by what happened at my friend's house, I have gone into contemplation mode. I am seriously thinking about how much I have in storage/wardrobes/garage that has not been used for quite some time. I am thinking about what all I have purchased in last three months. I am not counting big, extravagent, purchases but the small, random expenses incurred that have not really added much value. To be honest, I know, the answer might shock me!
It is difficult to make right choices in the times where culture of unnecessary indulgence is deliberately cultivated and nurtured by media and various companies selling their products. The key is in being conscious about our needs and wants. And the trick lies in understanding and respecting difference between the two.
I remember a quote I had read somewhere, "Buy what is only necessary, not what is convenient. What is unnecessary, even if it costs one cent, is expensive."
Also a quote from a movie, Fight club "The things you own end up owning you."
What happened at my friend's house is not only about money or lack of discipline in spending. It is much beyond it. It reflects how sometimes even the most intelligent of us end up giving in to temptations, fall prey to social pressure of being on "equal' position with the rest and end up having a life style that may not always be possible to have considering one's financial condition. It is a reflection of how we allow others (friends, relatives, advertisements, promotions by the companies..etc)to define what is "good" for us and are drowned by wanton consumption, failing to accept our limitations and end up creating a mess by spending our time, money and energy on things we don't really need!
