I was heading towards the billing counter at Landmark book store when I saw a little girl, about five years playing with blocks kept for the children near the music section. Her nanny, barely in her teens, stood close to the tiny table loaded with blocks and other toys, watching admiringly. I stopped at the music section pretending to check some music while observing this tiny tot make beautiful designs with blocks. (I am guilty of this crime every time I visit this book store. It makes me feel nostalgic of the times when my son was that age)
A few minutes must have passed when a lady walked in with a boy about eight or nine with Down syndrome. The boy watched the girl play with blocks and gravitated towards her table bit hesitantly. The girl was too engrossed to notice him. This continued for some time and after a while when the girl finally noticed the boy, she sensed there was something different about him and soon her expressions changed. Perhaps, she had not seen someone like that before!
What followed was amazing! The girl approached the boy and asked, "bhaiya aap mere saath kheloge?"(would you like to play with me brother?) The boy withdrew completely and walked away towards his mother. The girl followed him, gave him a hug and said, "chalo na bhaiya, aap ko maza ayega" ( let's go brother, you would have great fun!) The boy's mother, touched by this beautiful gesture of the girl, smiled and took both children to the table and encouraged her son to play with her. Once she saw them striking a chord, she resumed her shopping in nearby section albeit checking every now and then if the children were okay. It did not take much time for the girl to be comfortable with the boy's little strange reactions and ways he communicated.
I was witnessing purest form of human connection and my eyes became moist watching that small girl encouraging the boy with claps and words like "very good bhaiya" even when he had not made much progress. I was wondering what a phenomenal human being that tiny girl was at such a tender age and what a beautiful creation God had made in a woman by giving her nurturing nature. Just then, mother of the girl emerged from another section and slapped the nanny using filthy words and abusing her for letting the girl play with the boy with the obvious disability.
I would prefer avoiding exact words mother of the girl used to describe the boy for they are far too cruel. The lady's outburst shocked the girl and she kept asking the mother, "mama, main bhiaya ke saath kyon nahi khel sakti?" ( mom, why can't I play with him?) The lady ignored her and dragged her out of the store while the nanny followed them helplessly. I was stunned by what had happened before my eyes as it was impossible for me to comprehend that a person could be this vile and inhuman towards someone already suffering so much! The boy started crying and his mother's expression changed while trying hard to console him. It was evident on her face that she had experienced painful encounters of denial, grief, anger, remorse, guilt, isolation and discrimination every day!
It was not the right time for me to show sympathy or talk to the mother and son hence I left for the billing counter but I was haunted by the face of that tiny little angel who had shown such remarkable maturity in dealing with the boy despite the obvious disability; crying helpless face of that boy and sullen face of his mother.
What makes us so insensitive towards people with disability? As parents we are sometimes overprotective about our children but does it mean we show complete disregard for someone else's suffering? The girl's mother's imbecile behaviour is a reflection of attitude we have as society towards disabled people. Parents typically fear their children might be exposed to some infectious disease. Agreed, sometimes coping with presence of a disabled child/person might not be easy but why use derogatory terms like "retards" or "curse from God"? Aren't they human beings too?
Having a disabled member is a huge, relentless task for family members who are invariably subjected to social isolation, abuse and discrimination. Every single day for them is an exhausting struggle to win and a painful story of great endurance due to unhealthy mindset of society and virtual apartheid.
Empathy is a core attribute of humanity and if we are devoid of it, what are we going to teach our children? But who said by giving birth to a child a woman becomes a mother?
A few minutes must have passed when a lady walked in with a boy about eight or nine with Down syndrome. The boy watched the girl play with blocks and gravitated towards her table bit hesitantly. The girl was too engrossed to notice him. This continued for some time and after a while when the girl finally noticed the boy, she sensed there was something different about him and soon her expressions changed. Perhaps, she had not seen someone like that before!
What followed was amazing! The girl approached the boy and asked, "bhaiya aap mere saath kheloge?"(would you like to play with me brother?) The boy withdrew completely and walked away towards his mother. The girl followed him, gave him a hug and said, "chalo na bhaiya, aap ko maza ayega" ( let's go brother, you would have great fun!) The boy's mother, touched by this beautiful gesture of the girl, smiled and took both children to the table and encouraged her son to play with her. Once she saw them striking a chord, she resumed her shopping in nearby section albeit checking every now and then if the children were okay. It did not take much time for the girl to be comfortable with the boy's little strange reactions and ways he communicated.
I was witnessing purest form of human connection and my eyes became moist watching that small girl encouraging the boy with claps and words like "very good bhaiya" even when he had not made much progress. I was wondering what a phenomenal human being that tiny girl was at such a tender age and what a beautiful creation God had made in a woman by giving her nurturing nature. Just then, mother of the girl emerged from another section and slapped the nanny using filthy words and abusing her for letting the girl play with the boy with the obvious disability.
I would prefer avoiding exact words mother of the girl used to describe the boy for they are far too cruel. The lady's outburst shocked the girl and she kept asking the mother, "mama, main bhiaya ke saath kyon nahi khel sakti?" ( mom, why can't I play with him?) The lady ignored her and dragged her out of the store while the nanny followed them helplessly. I was stunned by what had happened before my eyes as it was impossible for me to comprehend that a person could be this vile and inhuman towards someone already suffering so much! The boy started crying and his mother's expression changed while trying hard to console him. It was evident on her face that she had experienced painful encounters of denial, grief, anger, remorse, guilt, isolation and discrimination every day!
It was not the right time for me to show sympathy or talk to the mother and son hence I left for the billing counter but I was haunted by the face of that tiny little angel who had shown such remarkable maturity in dealing with the boy despite the obvious disability; crying helpless face of that boy and sullen face of his mother.
What makes us so insensitive towards people with disability? As parents we are sometimes overprotective about our children but does it mean we show complete disregard for someone else's suffering? The girl's mother's imbecile behaviour is a reflection of attitude we have as society towards disabled people. Parents typically fear their children might be exposed to some infectious disease. Agreed, sometimes coping with presence of a disabled child/person might not be easy but why use derogatory terms like "retards" or "curse from God"? Aren't they human beings too?
Having a disabled member is a huge, relentless task for family members who are invariably subjected to social isolation, abuse and discrimination. Every single day for them is an exhausting struggle to win and a painful story of great endurance due to unhealthy mindset of society and virtual apartheid.
Empathy is a core attribute of humanity and if we are devoid of it, what are we going to teach our children? But who said by giving birth to a child a woman becomes a mother?
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